Big City Rush

Before you begin the process of taking in the words your eyes will read, I want you to focus your mind letting the words take you on a journey…..for some, maybe even a memory of a regular experience.

I do get that in “the city life” time is very crucial and most of your life revolves around that, BUT that’s really no excuse why you can’t slow down every so often.

There’s a combination of words that my ears have sadly gotten used to NOT hearing…….

EXCUSE ME!

Yes, that’s not something I hear quite often, and just in case you want to play smart or cute, you can add the words “PARDON and SORRY” to that list.

Those words are words that I don’t hear quite often, as a matter of fact, those are words that I almost NEVER hear. All I hear is….actually, I don’t hear anything. But despite the absence of words, I do feel that someone wants to pass. I feel it with bumps & pushes, and feel it when someone squeezes or forces themselves to pass by me or between me and someone else.

spits

Now, I know there may be some of you thinking, “oh you must be standing in the way”. So let me just clarify the reality for you and tell you this, “as long as you’re standing, you’re always in the way, even when you’re not”.

BIG CITY LIFE is what they call it.

I find myself living in it for quite some time now, but for some reason I can’t adapt, I maybe even REFUSE to adapt to that extent where I lose the manners my mother spent years of TIME instilling it in me.

You know what, let’s use an example: Just think of a train pulling up to the platform and doors open up, you’d think logical and most efficient, not forgetting mannered way to go about the transfer is for those in the train to be allowed to step out first right? In the real world that is the case (or maybe in the fantasy world), but in this city life, clearly everyone seems to act like chickens without heads. There seems to be a lack of logic in this city life I’m sensing, maybe the lack of time to process logic is too short……? When the train pulls up and doors open, all a person is trying to do it get out of the train, so why not just wait on the side so someone can exit? YES, just as they want to get off you want to get on, but where will you go if there is no space on the train? But noooooooo, it seems as though that’s asking for too much. As the train pulls up it’s as though everyone goes into some form of predator-mode. The predators are hungry and the train is finally bringing food and water after weeks of starvation. NO! That’s not the case, so why can’t people take a few seconds of their time and act civilized? Trains, metros, trams, busses, all the same. You know what’s even more scary, the uncivilized rush and lack of manners isn’t only limited to public transport? Sorry if I made it seem as though that is the only time people express their lack of manners. I mean, where do I even CONTINUE to burn this “city life”?

Take a walk with me off of the public transport. Let’s take a tour in the city with your imagination.  Walking streets is another mess, it’s another uncivilized environment. People seem to have absolutely no consideration whatsoever, it’s a free-for-all. Sometimes it feels as though I’m in a car tumbling down a cliff, I’m being maneuvered beyond my will, left, right, forward, all because people don’t want to say the words “EXCUSE ME”.

But you know, apart from that all, the thing that bothers me most of the BIG CITY LIFE is people’s ability to mind their own business when they shouldn’t! Hahaha, I’m sure you’re thinking if minding your own business isn’t supposed to be a good thing. Well, no, not in cases when your help is needed. Yes assholes, quite often your help can be quite helpful. How about times when you’re comfortably in a seat and an elderly person comes in and the public transport is full, just maybe it may be helpful to offer the seat! What about when a mother is struggling with her baby and stroller to get it in or out of public transport, maybe it would be helpful to help! What about when someone falls, whether  because the floor is iced over, falling off of a bicycle or just loses their stability. In many cases, just maybe it would be helpful to help!

Just maybe if people weren’t always in such a rush to go nowhere they would have a spare minute just to be helpful, just to be mannered! 

0

Happiness Is Your Compass

As you keep turning or flipping the calendar, you’ll come to a period where you will need to ask yourself a question or 2. Is it a must? No, but it’s a should.

So I’m guessing you’re waiting to read what these questions are, fine! Keep reading then…….Remember, I’m not forcing you, it’s just an opinionated suggestion. 

Question 1: What makes you happy? What are the things that drive you or motivate you?

Question 2: Are you genuinely happy, or are you just being content? Are you settling for your current life status?

Question 3: Are you accomplishing what you want out of life, or what people are expecting of you? Is your life story being written by you or others?

Question: Are you alive or living? It’s one thing to have life, but are you using it?

Now, you may think that these are pretty basic question, which may well be true, but don’t be so quick to judge. Ask yourself how simple they really are.  Are they simple to answer, or are they just simple to read and understand? If you don’t know the answer to a question, you’ll never be able to answer it. You see, the thing about not self-reflecting or evaluating your life is, you become quite unaware. Unaware from the most simple things in your life to the most complex. You become so comfortable with the way your life is going that you sometimes settle and ‘go with the flow’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that this in itself is a bad thing, but ask yourself another question……why settle? 

live

Happiness isn’t about being accepting or being okay with your current situation. Happiness is about being where you want to be in every context. Where you want to be physically, mentally…….in general, being where you want to be in life. But to be there you need to know where there is and what it is that makes you happy. You will have family and friends who are ambitious FOR you, they will want FOR you, they will HOPE for you, they will expect FROM you, but at the end of the day they have no idea exactly what it is you really want. Their vision should never be your goal. Not because it looks and sounds good means that your path, there are many other paths that look and sound good. So…..Is that what you really want? Is that where you really want to go? Is that who you want to be? Will that make you happy? As you can see, it all ties in which each other.

You owe it to yourself to be the captain of your own ship, so take control of the wheel and steer your life in the direction that you want to head. You see, true happiness comes from accomplishing your own goals, doing what YOU want to do, being where YOU want to be, and only when you are doing so you are truly living…..LIVING YOUR LIFE! Take some time out and reflect on your life, ask yourself the relevant questions, answer the questions and live your life how you want, you deserve to live your life happy doing what you love.

0

Unsocial media.

How plugged in are you? How unplugged are you really?

It’s crazy how you’d think that being in this technological age we’d all be more connected. If you look at it from a technical perspective, we are. You may not be able to see it, but you’re making use of it. Transmissions are being transferred constantly – invisible communication waves beaming from every electronic device that we own or that’s around us. The idea of this convenience is brilliant, the hopes of the good it does is so reassuring, but that’s the optimism that existed before the results were evident.

I am one of those modern day technological junkies that’s plugged into this system, the system that’s pretty much fucking our ability to socialize. The ability to be connected to friends, family, strangers, the world, information, entertainment, and everything else that the world has to offer is refreshing. I often feel as though I can never miss out on my life or the life of others. It’s all available by the swiping or clicking of my fingers tips. All this accessibility is supposed to connect us more, make us more social….afterall, isn’t that the reason these connected platforms are called ‘social media’?

Connected, connection……… such tricky word, so ironic. What or who are you really connected to? The people you speak to, or the devices you use for their platforms? It’s crazy how connected we are, the access given to us to increase our sociability, but yet connection leans in favor of our devices instead of people. Believe me or not, that’s how it is.. that’s how it works.

hig-traffic-systems-light-pavement

Take a look at this picture, notice the glowing strip on the floor? It’s not a reflection of a nearby light, it’s a stop light. This picture was taken in a city called Bodegraven in the Netherlands. People have become so connected to the online world that they become disconnected from reality. How social is that right? How connected are you to the real world at this point? People have become so consumed by the social devices that they have become unsocial in life. How bizarre is it that we’ve come to this point that people’s heads are always DOWN in their phones that extreme measures need to be taken as such ensure safety?……un-fucking-social is what is is!

phone-check-2

What do you get out of this picture? I want you to be as real and honest to yourself as possible. Doesn’t this look familiar? Doesn’t this reflect you at times? It sure as hell does with me. This picture sadly enough depicts modern day society. It shows exactly how plugged in we are and how unplugged we are from life. All of these persons in this picture are most likely using some form of SOCIAL media…..imagine that, they’re using social platforms but their socializing skills are just lessening. This is in no way a good sight, no way a good future, no way a life to be happy about.

marriage

ABORT! ABORT!! ABORTTTTTTTT!!! Social media isn’t what you think, it doesn’t help you become more social per se. If you’re into the whole posting your life happening publicly then sure, shoot. Nothing beats a good old fashion face to face conversation, one that doesn’t include being disturbed by your devices. Unplug yourself from the network and plug yourself back into reality. That could be you in the picture, and trust me….if you’re okay with that then you’re more fucked up than I thought.

0

Hurricane Irma: St.Maarten’s rise from the ashes.

Wednesday September 6th 2017. Just as 22 years before that, my island, my home will remember this date.

While the foreign media, local media, many foreign and local individuals may choose to highlight the negatives, I believe that the positive should not be overlooked. The world, just as much as you and I, are aware of this disaster caused by Hurricane Irma. This horrific, ugly storm that took away so much from so many people. I believe that the experience, the memory and the visuals are sufficient to tell the story for itself. Hours of that terrifying experience is more than enough for one to live through, so why is there a need to force these victims and the rest of the world to live through it again?

sxm

Can you imagine, or even try to imagine what it was like living through such a monstrous disaster hour after hour not knowing when it would end? I’m talking about 200 mph wind, gusting , whistling, pressuring through every crack that it can, tearing apart everything it can grab hold of. Heavy rain pouring with no signs of letting up, flooding everywhere and everything that touches the ground. Being trapped in your house, walls shaking as if the storm itself held onto them trying to pull them apart. With such fury and anger, hearing your roof tearing away bit by bit, all you can do is HOPE….yes HOPE! that whatever is fastening your roof will be strong enough to withstand the horrifying grips of Irma. What a scary feeling, what a scary thing to imagine, because that’s all I can do, IMAGINE. I wasn’t there, I didn’t experience this, so all I can TRY and do is translate a fragment of the feelings my friends and family expressed to me.

Wow! Just rethinking the stories has me shook. But as I said before, my focus right now isn’t the weaknesses that Hurricane Irma exposed about my people, but the strengths it did. My Sint Maarten people, YOU are survivors, YOU are strong, but most importantly YOU are ADMIRABLE. Through it all where the odds weren’t in their favor, they are still rising above. Through it all when so much was taken away, they are still rising above. ADMIRABLE is the only word I can think of that can give you an idea of how strong they are and how progressive their strengths are making them. We’re almost a few days short of a month post Hurricane Irma and SXM is already crawling, in some cases even walking. Yes our legs aren’t strong enough to make the steps alone, but we’re getting there. Power is restored to most parts of the island, and so is water. Businesses, banks, gas stations, restaurants, supermarkets, and stores are opened and more are opening as the island progresses. Today, October 2nd 2017 schools are already getting back into full swing, so our kids can already get back intp their routine. Cleaning efforts are being executed on a large scale, so the streets are being cleaned and debris are being cleared around the island. The port is already operational, the airport is undergoing its repair process, but is functional for military and relief aircrafts. Now you tell me, just a few weeks after such a devastation, how can you not be impressed? My island may be small, but we have big hearts!

You know what makes me smile most? The sight of St.Maarten operating as a community. All hands are on deck, everyone is helping one another get back on their feet one way or another. Great initiatives are being made by banks and other other business through these tough times to help alleviate the strain of the people. So as much as it hurt to see my island in the state that it is in, it’s heartwarming to see the progression of the people. One can have nothing else but a smile to see the strides being made, to see how we as people are maturing in the right direction.

So tell me, how can I focus on the bad and the ugly when there is so much beauty happening right in front of my face? My home is being rebuilt brick by brick, house by house, not alone, but together. Together with the help of its people, together with the help of our fellow humans & earthlings, together with the help of the relief efforts, and together with the help of the family and friends of Sint Maarten that’s living abroad.

21687194_1620837957947209_4086612985001050199_o

I’ve always been proud of my island, and this just makes it more clear as to why I am! As I’ve seen so many mention and I love it, “Sint Maarten is just temporarily closed for renovation, we’ll be back soon!”.

Just a FEW pictures of the positive progression that is happening and been happening on St.Maarten:

1

Mind Gone

This is the hardest part of it all, accepting. There are so many thoughts, emotions, and feelings that’s caged inside of your body with no point of escape. I can feel it all bottling up inside of me, unsettled – as if my mental is a victim of my physical. They say “caging a beast will never end well in the end”, at this point I can attest to that. My sanity is going, I’m losing grip of my control, I’m simply losing my mind. Don’t take this lightly, I mean this is in every context you’re able to put that line in.

My life is one that’s been on a journey. My mental was built on experience, what little I may have to some, what great amount I have according to myself. I’ve molded my mental with confidence, not of it’s ability to hold my mind, but with confidence that my mind would not be altered by external factors. But you see, I’m a dreamer, some may call me something of an optimist. I’m hopeful in what greatness tomorrow may bring, by of course excluding the negative possibilities.

thinking

It seems thought that reality is winning against this fantasy of a world I’ve been hiding behind. This charade, this facade of a life. I’ve sentenced my mind to a lifetime of no escape, no chance of being free, for the only FREEdom I had was if my mind stayed with me. I can feel the battering, the tearing down of walls, the movements searching a way of escape. I cannot allow my fortress to be breached, I WILL not allow that.

I’ve realized and decided that I must win this battle, but to win takes great sacrifice. My mind will never be at peace if it’s not at peace. Enough of the fighting, it’s time to start ACCEPTING what is and put your mind to rest.

0

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑